CYCM 17/11/18 - Red Bed Redemption

Course You Can Malcolm returns to the SMRE Bar on Saturday 17th November to provide supporters with a solid three hours worth of entertainment ahead of the FC United v Telford match - Doors open at 12 noon.

Over to you Malcomses to tell us, in your own words, exactly what will be going on.

Mid-November: awkward time of the year, innit? Caught in a dark, drizzly limbo between Bonfire Night and the oncoming madness of Christmas, it’s tempting to sack it all off, get your Hygge on, and just stay in bed for a month. A bit like John and Yoko, minus the sanctimonious, protesty aspect of it all (and probably minus the impeccable whiteness of their sheets after a month’s worth of lying around leaves your fitted sheets grey and decidedly whiffy).

Really, though, who wants to spend all their time lying in bed? Morrissey recently espoused the joys of hiding under your duvet and locking yourself away from the world on his last album, and look at the state of him now: a quasi-Farage chump with as much relevance as dial up internet. So, no, clearly it isn’t a good idea. Luckily John and Yokofor those of you seeking to free themselves from the shackles of their duvet and matching bedspread though, CYCM returns this Saturday, to entice you off your mattress and out of your SpongeBob pyjamas with music, a quiz, more music, and all the usual Malcolms tertulia-based fun we like to send your way. Read on to see how Hygge can well and truly do one:

11:00 The Oddies Arrive:
Up early on a Saturday to put a hefty stage together and stick flags up? While the Early Bird Oddies will disagree with everything just written and think staying in bed is ace, once it’s all done and set up, they’ll know they made the right choice

12:00 Doors Open:
And they’re fancy doors too, now the SMRE has been all spruced up

12:45 Q&A with Mike Faulkner
Our new player development and analysis coach, Mike Faulkner will be holding a Q&A session.

12:55 Quizzy Karl’s Quizical Quiz:
Last time round, Karl’s quiz was hard. Very hard. Teeth were gnashed. Friendships were strained. Grown men cried. And we’re doing it all again for all the sados amongst you….

1:30 Gideon Conn:
An old friend of CYCM, and it’s ruddy, ruddy marvellous to welcome him back

2:20 Hey Bulldog:
Another old friend of CYCM; the ruddy marvelousness just keeps on getting ruddier

3:00 The Fitba:
Will a team revitalised by Neil Reynolds have Telford quaking in their boots? And why would they have to be in their boots to quake in the first place? To find out the answers to these questions and more, just go up onto the terraces and find out for yourselves

Gideon Conn
If you’re not familiar with Gideon, then where to start? We should probably begin by quoting his website: “After finishing a degree in sculpture at MMU, Gideon decided to become a builder, but nipped that in the bud Gidafter 8 months because it was very hard work. That was the point when he decided to be a full time artist and musician. He became a feature on the Manchester indie folk scene and was known for doing drawings at gigs and giving them to bands as a souvenirs. Known for effortlessly blending acoustic folk and hip hop, Gideon has a unique performance style which make audiences very happy.”

He’s certainly made us happy when he’s played for us previously, and it’s making us even happier to welcome him back again. A firm favourite of the Oddies, you’ll need to see Gideon in action to fully appreciate what we’re banging on about. To get a flavour of what to expect, have a ganders here.
http://gideonconn.com/videos/

Hey Bulldog
Back in 2014 when Hey Bulldog last performed for us, we described them as “a smarter than smart band with psychedelic tendencies and a penchant for ear-bleeding riffs.” Fast forward to today, and they describe themselves as “…the saviours of Manchester rock ‘n’ roll. Favourites on the live circuit ofHey Bulldog their home town and gaining acclaim beyond its frontiers, their sound is a bluesy psych jambalaya of hot riffs and saucy grooves.”

No strangers to radio thanks to being played by the likes of Steve Lamacq and Chris Hawkins on BBC 6 Music, Radio X, Planet Rocks/Mojo Magazine’s Phil Alexander, BBC Introducing and Amazing Radio to name but a few, they’ll be back in the limelight again when their new single ‘No Future (Part II)’ is released for streaming this month, and downloading in December. We also can’t let a preview about the band pass without mentioning the fact they enjoyed themselves that much the last time they played for us, it inspired them to write their 2015 song ‘Makin’ Friends Not Millionaires’. Which quite frankly, is ace, if you ask me. Have a look here for a peak at their back catalogue.
http://www.hey-bulldog.com/videos.html

It’s not all fun and games though; we’ll also be taking care of the serious business of eating and drinking. Alongside the bar, there’ll be Westwells cheese and onion pies and tater ash, Mike Noodle’s veggie offerings, Pete’s vegan offerings, homemade cakes, and in yet another world first for us (we’ve had loads, just look it up on Wikipedia, or something), old-skool Malcolms head Blaine will be supplying us with homemade red cabbage to accompany the tater ash. Intriguingly, he says that it’s ‘stylistically more sauerkraut-like than traditional’. There’s not been this much interest surrounding cabbage since Mossley’s finest played for us a couple of years ago….

Right then; you know the turns we’ve got on, you know the food and drink we’re going to be serving, and you know where we’re doing it, so the big question is: Fancy it? If so, make sure you don’t find yourself still in bed by midday watching old episodes of Homes Under the Hammer, and get down to Broadhurst Park instead. You’ll be rewarded with a loving, Red embrace of your ears, mind and soul. And your bed can’t give you that.

Just so you know: if you come looking for us in the St. Mary’s Road End, then, well, you’re in the right place, because that’s our permanent gaff, now. Just head to the turnstiles and make your way about two-thirds down the SMRE. You can’t really miss us as we have a big, dock off stage for a start, plus you’ll no doubt see SFTB wandering around with either a ladder, drill and/or his latest Ebay purchase in his hands.

And as always: entrance to CYCM is completely freemans, with the usual rules applying: no divviness, nuclear weapons or anyone who’s ever used the phrase “Get your head in the game”. Refugees welcome.